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Blonde Goddess

Blonde Goddess (1982) Movie Poster
  •  USA  •    •  83m  •    •  Directed by: Bill Milling.  •  Starring: David Messa, Barbara Peckinpaugh, Jacqueline Lorians, Loni Sanders, Jungle Jane, Ron Feilen, Ron Jeremy, Gordon G. Duvall, Matt West, Colleen Anderson, Tamara West, Jane Kelton, Misty Regan..
Comic artist nerd Elmo Smathers fantasizes over himself as Johnny Ace, WWI ace pilot, battling the German Black Baron; as Private Eye Jack Hammer; and as a heroic construction worker who is transported to a spaceship by the galactic overlord, Megazon (along with a beautiful and innocently by-standing earthling). The "Blonde Goddess" makes an appearance in each fantasy.


Image from: Blonde Goddess (1982)
Image from: Blonde Goddess (1982)
Image from: Blonde Goddess (1982)
Image from: Blonde Goddess (1982)
It's surprising that no one (before me) has commented on this once-legendary porn title, still readily available on DVD and a theatrical smash once upon a time.

I had seen it in the original run, and re-watching on DVD enjoyed once more the silliness. This is spoof, making fun of RAIDERS OF THE LOST ARK and anticipating ROMANCING THE STONE. Joe Sarno followed up with an extremely similar film a year later, HOT STUFF, which did not make the initial impression that GODDESS did.

Susanna Britton stars in the title role, yet another actress "too pretty for porn". Watching her one is struck by the fact that she should be in mainstream films, but who's to complain about her XXX antics? David Messa stars as a cartoonist at a comic book company, a vaguely MarvelDC wannabe outfit. He keeps dreaming of being the real-life hero of the various adventures he illustrates for the book, and that is the content we watch. He reprised one of his characters, Louisana Smith (hardly any competition for Harrison Ford) in Sarno's HOT STUFF movie.

The action is hot, and besides Britton, a very young Jacqueline Lorians is incredibly alluring in several roles, including a segment shot in black & white for a noir look. Loni Sanders guest stars, but her beauty and erotic talent is not properly used, while it is always a pleasure to see Heather Young in action, also in a smaller role.

Ron Jeremy is quite amusing, doing very familiar shtick including his favorite patter and Fritz Feld impression, oddly cast as a Baron von Richtofen figure in aerial dogfights with our hero. Some of this footage almost elevates the film to "real movie" status, but its end credits' claim of having been shot in France, Mexico and London's "Pinecone Studios" is clearly bogus.

Director Bill Milling made several classics (A SCENT OF HEATHER is likely his best), and this one is not great, but definitely a goodie. I prefer the Sarno followup, but that's just my own personal taste.

Review by lor_ from the Internet Movie Database.