I could insult the brutally pathetic directorwriterproducers for having less shame then a middle aged prostitute in Alabama who wants her own reality show...and simply won't take NO for an answer.
I could make countless references to how this film is not just "studenty", but in pretty much every way imaginable is actually written, produced, directed, and executed at literally a sub-student level.
I could even suggest that comically inept and brutally shameless juvenile film-sociopaths like these should truly be jailed in some sort of future hypothetical Cinema-Crimes facility for those who blaspheme and tarnish the shining and majestic institution which they are not even fit to mop the floors of.
And I could laugh, point, and mock the equally hilariousshameless creature design, which everyone will be doing soon anyway.
I'll simply say what I often say after watching a few minutes of films like these (who can make it past a few minutes?). This film, and others like it, are no more or less then the result of the enthusiasm of people who lack the talent and skill to make a decent film, but have all the drive and motivation that legitimate film makers do.
Why else would bad (well, foul, actually) films get made? Wait, strike that, they have MORE drivemotivation, come to think of it. Finding funding for a kiddie-script like this must certainly be far more difficult then shopping a gooddecentgreat script around. Mindless noobs like these should be required by law to take some sort of motivation-reducing pharmaceutical yet to be invented by a film-loving doctorresearcher somewhere. PLEASE, HURRY DOC! Bad films have always been a part of cinema. But never so much as now. Digital (i.e. "video" cameras) have opened the door to lessor-noobs who would not have even made the cut for being a "bad film maker" in past film history. Talk about Less Then Zero? How can you suck MORE then a really bad film maker? Well, now you can. GO PROGRESS! It's a new era of suckage which has never existed before, this putrid era of worse-then-bad films from stylisticmental children with LOADS of drive. And wait, it's only getting worse. Image a decade from now, when the tools will have become even more affordable and accessible for even LESS talented film-tards! Oh the horror! But, and it's a very small but, this film does have some small value for those who enjoy the Asylum films, and any other unintentionally hilarious bad films.
Lobby hard, everyone, for legislation in the near future to prosecute crimes against cinema. I suggest a stinking and highly unhygienic floating prison island, where the cine-criminals are forced to watch only the movies produced by the inmates for 23.5 hours a day. Oh, and Ewe Boll films. Life sentences for all of them! Please, see this film!
Review by Horse_Caulk from the Internet Movie Database.