Transmorphers: Fall of Man |
  • USA • 2009 • 86m •   • Directed by: Scott Wheeler. • Starring: Bruce Boxleitner, Jennifer Rubin, Shane Van Dyke, Alana DiMaria, Russ Kingston, Silvy Kas, Jack Goldenberg, Debra Harrison-Lowe, Amy Van Horne, Benjamin W. Smith, Vana O'Brien, Jay Beyers, Jason Yorrick. • Music by: Chris Cano, Chris Ridenhour.      In this present day prequel, the robot invaders attack the Earth, forcing a small band of humans to seek refuge below the surface of the planet.
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Review:
Production value is pretty rough. They use the same old refinery from virtually all the Asylum movies. Actually they couldn't even scrape together their usual cast of ever returning actors. Seriously every movie has the same people playing small roles. It does give a certain continuity and ruins less careers I guess.
They even manage to get some actors not working for scale like Bruce Boxleitner. However he can not save this dog.
The camera crew does a decent job with what they have and the sound is OK. We are talking relative terms here. Ed Wood would call this a masterpiece, but it isn't.
One production issue I had a problem with and at this point it would be nitpicking given the nature of these films. Keep the main character's wound in the same spot OK. It was almost never in the same spot. For that matter do people run around covered in their own gore for days on end?
Which brings us to some other funny issues. The "scientist" gets a pipe put into her leg that they pull out while in the magical van that transmorphs from a 1994 Chrysler mini that the door wont shut on to a 2000 that is missing its wheel covers. So yes there was a transmorphing in the film. All while travelling very slowly(look out the window, trees are barely moving in the background...priceless) At least it was filmed in a vehicle. This character then limps for about half a scene before becoming pretty much fine. About on par with the girl in Cloverfield when pulled off the rebar.
There are so many weird things happening with script and plot you have to see it to believe it. But the most epic part is when the Mayor whos' daughter has an operation(as you are told over and over) ask the scientist about the difference between ETs and Aliens. All I can say is she must have been pretty drunk during the shoot and they wanted to wrap. She is wobbling around slurring and is kinda touchy feely. "Thanks for the respect" LOL. The lines that do come out are incoherent at best and require the Mayor to explain what she meant while one of the other characters is caught rolling her eyes. In fact Dr Drool has a plate magically appear in front where she tied her sweater around her hips after the slurring explanation of what friendlyenemy like bad and good creatures from space are. At this point the Mayor mentions how good he is at cooking. She then remembers her cue but not the location of said magical plate. After wobbling a bit and looking around behind her in both directions, she gets that excited look (like a kid getting a bowl of ice cream)when she find it tucked into the front of her pants.
I mean it has lots of funny moments but this was really the best for the 5 people who watched it with me. We had to re-watch it 3 times because we were crying so hard from the stupidity of the scene. "I guess thats a take eh!" Replied one of my buddies. The whole scene probably could have hit the cutting room floor. But it wouldn't have been a feature length film if they had tried to fix all the errors in this dog so why bother.
To be fair I would have been pretty drunk while filming this too. I hope they had fun filming it, because it is very funny in a "The Room" sort of way. Better than some other Asylum films and I did like it better than Paranormal Activity. I wish one of the MST3K groups would take a crack at the asylum movies. Pure gold as they are a self parody.
Review by thorin_bane from the Internet Movie Database.
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